Dishing The Soaps!

Well I won’t go into the rant at least not about the reason behind the delay so on to the babbling. I was a bit confused at first when Brooke seemed to be into it but nope she was just messing with Whip. To quote a jackass in Salem, “Dude she’s just not that into you.” You can feel free to give me a massage or foot rub anytime Whip since that sounds nice. Nope for some insane reason Brooke wants her Boob. Maybe she should take a sanity test complete with inkblots.

I’m baffled about Boobette’s attitude towards Brooke. Why go after the one person that was actually supportive of the relationship with Rick instead of joining the others and forbidding two consenting adults from being together. Sure a kid wants their parents together but guess what that doesn’t always work and Boobess isn’t the only one that’s had pain so that was pretty shitty of her to tell Brooke to back off. Did she just use Rick to get her parents back together? Okay maybe this is an oddball thought because people seem to hate him and think that he only got involved with her to break up Brooke and Boob but what if it’s actually the other way around. I haven’t seen her with Rick at all lately and even when he’s around she isn’t really with him so I have to wonder about that.

I think Pam likes Whip and she did make a good point about his name. Oh of course Pam wouldn’t have a single naughty thought. Yeah right I’m sure she learned a thing or two watching Dimbo with her honey bear. And he does like her Lemon Bars. Maybe she puts booze in them. Now Stephanie is stumped because the man candy isn’t working on Brooke. When will it occur to her that for Brooke this idiot is the great love of her life although I can’t figure it out myself. If someone can please let me know because I don’t get it.

Oh yes Boob is really happy with Boobess. Hello pathetic much Boobess asking Boob to marry her. What the hell is that? They’re back together for ten minutes and she’s already asking him to marry her. I guess she thought she’d strike right now after all Boob did run after Brooke and he was later spotted by Boobette 2 hugging her and comforting her. Yes Brooke was stupid when she put Boob’s hand in Boobess and told them to be together since she clearly wasn’t thinking. I know that made no sense to me. The idiot should be alone for a while but of course that won’t happen with Mommy plotting with Boobess and of course the Boobettes plotting to get the two married. And damn it all there wasn’t any Oweny goodness to enjoy during the stupidity of The Booby Bunch so yes once again The Booby Bunch dominated. At least Pam was around to lighten things a little bit. Did you not listen to my demands? Owen needs to be shirtless if I have to suffer through The Booby Bunch. Shudder to think how horrible it would be if this soap was an hour long.

Hey Roman haven’t seen you in a while. Well when you’ve got a hottie like this you want to spend a little alone time with him so I see nothing wrong with Sami bringing the kids over to great grandma’s place. At least he’s giving the thumbs up to Rafe and I agree because I think he’s up to the task too. But Rafe if you aren’t I’d like to give you the chance to be up to the task with me. Just thought I’d offer just in case. Yes I know this is the same picture but come on I just want to enjoy the view and hopefully I won’t get too distracted.

Well Kate’s hair is actually cute. Imagine that me saying something nice about hair while I was relieved to find that Stephanie didn’t cut her hair because that wouldn’t be good if that was her hair now. Maybe try another look sweetie but I guess heartbreak leads to having bad hair or alien hair. Yes it is cute Kate but I’m just not sure about stripes. So while her haircut looks cute I’m just not liking all those stripes and please do something about Philip’s hair. He gets a haircut and now it’s all poofy. What was wrong with it before? If the hair looks good don’t screw around with it and he totally excused himself so he could go to the bathroom and poof up his hair some more. I don’t think I’d want to go to Salem for fear I’d end up with funky looking hair.

Finally Nathan and Melanie go for that dinner but he gets beeped so she ends up alone at the pub.  While she’s waiting Phillip and his hair show up. I think he might be happy with his poofy hair since he’s all smiley. I just don’t think I can make it poof and I’m sure that would take hairspray so I don’t even want to bother try. Maybe that’s why he’s smiling since he might be getting a buzz from the hairspray. Ooh is there another crackfic in my future? Who knows there just might be. You never can tell with me since I’ve gone pretty strange at times.

So Sami’s secret spot and Rafe’s secret spot turn out to be the same spot. Sami arrives to find some chick calling out the name Emily. Of course it has to be the Emily after all this is a pretty small town although I’ve never seen this chick before. They talk and Meredith reveals that she’s Emily’s sister. Sami of course is curious about how she died along with me of course but she doesn’t mention that part although she does reveal that Emily, herself and Emily’s fiancee came to that spot. Okay am I the only one that found that a bit odd? That seems more like a spot where you’d go to spend alone time with your honey not with your honey and her sister.

Rafe finally shows up and unfortunately he isn’t shirtless at all. Come on Rafe you need to do your duty in removing the shirt so I can enjoy the very nice view. I know I’m not the only one that enjoys that. Anyhoo neither one of them mention the fact that Sami met Meredith or that the secret spot isn’t so secret since it was his secret spot too. When you think about it this could be another sign that these two are meant to be together since they both have the same secret spot or maybe I’m just being insane again. Since it was a bit awkward Sami decides to leave and pick up the kids although he was going to be shirtless so shame on you Sami for denying me of that view but I guess I can forgive you considering the weirdness of the circumstances.

Well wasn’t that just handy how Maggie just happened to have a scarf that matched Chloe’s outfit. There’s also the option of a necklace instead of a scarf. If Chloe thought about the scarf she might have tied the scarf to Kate but of course that would require her to have a functioning brain and right now I’m just not sure that she has one. She does end up talking to Daniel and wow she actually realizes how stupid she was so maybe the brain did power up there for a second but unable to resist the chocolate she starts snacking on the poisoned what were they brownies which isn’t good. That is so wrong using chocolate for evil but it isn’t the first time this was done after all there were those candy bars in Sunnydale.

After yelling at Chris over some picture Kate ends up calling Maggie using Chloe’s phone. Well it is hard to keep track of them since everyone has the exact same cell phone. I guess there was a huge sale or something. She uses the tape recording of Daniel and Chloe so Maggie hears this conversation. I don’t know if it’s just because I see what Kate’s doing but the conversation sounded so fake but Maggie bought it. This will tie in nicely with Kate’s plan after all Chloe is nibbling away at the poisoned chocolate and I’m thinking this latest dose is going to be really bad. Does that mean there’s more seizing ahead. Okay it was funny not that a person having a seizure was funny but it is funny if you’re Chloe.

It is kind of funny that Daniel works out with the two guys that were in love with Chloe at one point. Well I guess if you look like that you’re working out and not sitting on the couch stuffing your face with donuts or whatever you happen to like. But it did give me a new type of porn that I’ll be adding to the list at my website. I’m debating between Pushup Porn and Exercise Porn. Sure I might want to smack Daniel but come on I’m not blind the boy is pretty darn easy on the eyes and despite his silly hair Phillip’s pretty cute too.

I want to smack Stephanie so I’ll try to be kind although that hairdo isn’t working. I’m just glad that wasn’t a haircut which I thought it was at first. It’s all tucked up under or something and there’s a strand all lonely and blowing in the wind. She got what she asked for and now that she has it she’s all upset. Hello you broke things off. This is what you wanted so what’s up you dummy? Maybe go somewhere to get a makeover since that hair just isn’t working. At least Phillip’s trying to give her space and in the meantime he can buy a fancy schmancy car and have some fun. I wonder if wind blowing through his hair will cause it to go even higher. It must be nice to be rich. I’m still waiting for that sack of money to arrive but sadly it never has.

Archie talks the guys into grabbing $250 each. They wonder if they miscounted but they drop it. Elliot keeps quiet but he finally does break and confesses to taking the money but it was an emergency and he did put it back but of course the confession came with a price since he has to clean the place up. That won’t be fun. Why don’t they hire someone to clean the flat? Just a thought.

Archie of course is a total moron since he blows the money on drinks. I’m thinking that wasn’t that many drinks either. Zak went shopping and got a tracksuit and possibly the sunglasses too along with some shoes I think that tell him how far he’s run. The only time I’ll run is if there’s something with an axe or chainsaw chasing me otherwise what’s the point especially when it’s so hot. And Kris ends up giving the money to Ravi  in an attempt to convince him not to fight. He did it and won while being incredibly lucky so he doesn’t need to do it again since he has nothing to prove. Why doesn’t Ash or Ass fight himself? Oh yeah he probably doesn’t want to break a nail like Enormous Jackass. I’m sure these two would be good pals. Hmm potential crossover idea could emerge.

 Well at least Anita’s having better luck on the boy front. Sure she was mad that he didn’t text her but he did end up getting in touch with her. I think Lauren’s just moving on to Wade to try to get over Newt and he doesn’t seem to be over her either. That was pretty shitty of him not to say anything when Lauren said the McQueens weren’t a clean breed. Instead he agreed and sadly poor Theresa heard them. So shame on you Newt for being an ass. Are you going to be another Boob bouncing back and forth between two girls only in British and a teen?

Archie’s such an idiot. I don’t think Elliot used any of the money. Hmm maybe my brain will kick in and come up with something. Why not? If the idea strikes I might as well see where it takes me after all I’m using the Xena philosophy of pretending to be what I want to be so maybe one day I’ll actually be worthy of the name writer instead of the girl that babbles on and suffers from a comma phobia. Maybe Elliot should buy some rubber gloves and other cleaning supplies because that isn’t going to be fun. I wonder if that includes the laundry. I wouldn’t want to even go there.