Dishing The Soaps!

I think Faith’s powers are on the fritz. She doesn’t seem to realize who Tabby is although she sense evil but she senses evil in the trashcan. Okay she doesn’t but she’s awfully jumpy. No wonder poor Charity is so spellbound by the silly fortuneteller and the light show that got activated by Faith coming in. Of course it would be bad for her for the twin sisters to be reunited.

Oh Sheridan you’ve been hosed but at least you know now but it just might be too late with that guy outside planning to blow you up. Why do they always try to kill her? Okay later on she gets a little evil and annoying but come on this is when she’s really sweet. Also I think that’s one of those Watcher goons that showed up. Isn’t he? Maybe I’ll watch that episode but I’m pretty sure he is.

Oh cute Miquel runs into Charity again. He’s quite brilliant isn’t he saying that his shirt is dry. Yes have a drink and don’t spill again. The cuteness of those two would make Tabby gag. It did suck that these two never really got together properly and then sadly it ended before that could happen okay there were new people playing the parts which I wasn’t so crazy about.

Oh Theresa there’s more to come with the spillage. Yes they were crazy accidents but just accidents. Why couldn’t it be Gwen instead? I wonder how different things would be if Gwen’s no stayed that way. She could leave town and never darken the town again. Yes I don’t like her and it’s not because she’s blonde since she isn’t always blonde since she is briefly a brunette.

Oh Julian and his romps. Rich people are certainly different from people with no money. I still volunteer to try out the rich thing if someone wants to give me the money. I think I’d make a good rich person and who knows I might go wild and get my hair done without using a coupon. I’m sure rich people don’t even know what coupons are at least the Cranes don’t know what they are. They would be pieces of paper that allow you to save money which you’d know nothing about being the richest family in the town of Harmony. Funny but I never did see anyone wearing a gas-mask around town.

Poor Theresa gets her hopes dashed when Ethan proposes to Gwen in the middle of the carnival. Of course she has no idea at this point that she will marry a Crane but there’s one little snag Ethan isn’t actually a Crane although right now he believes he is one. That is pretty impressive Ivy keeping that secret for all those years. Of course she responds by crying out which the two hear. Oops make sure to run away before they catch you crying out since you’ll look crazy especially after the encounters Theresa’s had with Ethan and more to come.

Charity wants to have her fortune told but Faith just isn’t into it. I guess she sense the evil brewing in the tent. I guess the crystal ball doesn’t like this so there’s a light show along with floating objects but Charity thinks it’s all part of the show. Oops Tabitha and Timmy start floating around which actually looked pretty fun. Okay Timmy wasn’t having fun but I think I would. Come on I can’t be the only one that wouldn’t mind floating around as long as I don’t have a bad landing.

Well that’s one good reason to want to be a nun or maybe that would be a bad reason since Whitney tells Theresa that she won’t have to shave. What is she going to do about her fashion magazines? I guess she could redo the nun outfit and update the wimple and maybe allow a little ankle to show and bling things up with some jewelry. The thought of Theresa a nun is amusing but the poor thing is devastated about Ethan popping the question to the wrong girl. Just be patient and he’ll be yours although damn it took long enough if you ask me and I realize no one’s asking me so I thought I’d answer anyway.

Maybe this will jumpstart my brain or something so I can write some more Passions stuff. I did do that Days/Passions crossover that I posted over at my website. I actually got the pen and paper when I woke up at the ass crack of not even going to acknowledge that as a time and wrote something. And color me surprised when I started typing it up that for the most part it made actual sense. Not too shabby for that early. So stay tuned because I plan on catching an episode here and there along with 90210 which I’ll be doing on the weekends since shortly I won’t be posting so far ahead on Hollyoaks. Well that made more sense than doing a bunch at the same time so I spread them out. Knock on wood that I’ll continue to be able to watch without delay. Until tomorrow when I’ll be back babbling about Hollyoaks first thing.

Oh Russ I just love the way you put a plan together. France maybe is such a solid plan when you’re going on the run with a baby and a small child along with two adults. It can’t fail with that kind of planning. Yes of course I’m being sarcastic since I think he’s being a total moron. Knock some sense into him Nancy. Snatching Max isn’t the way to get time with his kid.

Leave it to Carmel to do a baby’s hair. Well he does have some hair. Jacqui is being really stubborn about the Russ thing. He should be allowed to see his kid. It’s not like Russ tried to take Max away before this oh so brilliant plan of his to kidnap Max and Charlie too. But she just won’t budge because she thinks of this as her one and only shot to have a child which isn’t true. There are options out there so it’s not like she couldn’t have a kid some other way. So little Max likes his Auntie Cousin Theresa. Uh Carmel I think she’s just his cousin and not his Auntie.

Well the dinner didn’t go very well. Sure it’s understandable that Hannah would be suspicious of Rhys. Why did Suzanne feel the need to tell him that. That wasn’t a smart thing to do but of course she’s worried about her daughter. I’m not convinced that she really did fall off the wagon or whatever you call it when a eating disorder’s involved. So it really didn’t help when Rhys acted like an idiot. He should have learned after all he loved Ash so is he really the best judge of character? The whole in love with his sister thing could be thrown back at him.

Sarah’s trying to cook a dinner for Lydia but it turns out she’s rubbish in the kitchen so she gets some help with that from Zoe and Nancy. Hmm Zoe mentioned having a good time together which is fine but I can’t help but wonder if it meant more than it sounded like. Am I reading something that isn’t there? After all she didn’t really object to making out with Sarah. Sure the whole thing is a wee bit weird since she was dating Mike at the time but this wouldn’t be the first time she tried things out with a girl.

Oh how horrible that would have been if Theresa gave up on her dreams. I’ve always liked the way she thinks and yes she’s crazy but I’ve always loved her for it. To believe in something that strongly. Okay it didn’t hurt that there was a little shirtless action so thank you Charity and how adorable were Charity and Miguel when they ran into each other literally?

Oh Faith they were waving at you because they thought you were your twin Grace. What I can’t figure out is how two twins that have been apart for twenty years would have the same hairdo. What are the odds of that happening? And they think poor Grace is going crazy because she said she didn’t talk to Miguel which is true because he was talking to Faith. Hee Seeker shirt. Maybe I should get one since I do enjoy the show and I’m not one of those crazy book people poo pooing the changes due to changes. Duh it happens so why can’t you just enjoy both like I do? I wonder why Faith chose that name? I guess it’s better sounding than Looker? Or she could be a fan of the Sword Of Truth series.

Theresa ends up going back to Tabitha and getting the answer she wants but Tabitha never said it was Ethan. Of course this is long before the truth comes out about Ethan’s paternity but she does end up becoming a Crane just not the Crane she wanted because the Crane she ended up with is just too horrible to think about. I’m not even sure all that money would make up for being married to Alistair Crane.

Listen to the fortune cookie since it was predicting the truth. I wonder where they get their fortune cookies from since the ones I get are always dumb and of course there’s the whole repeating thing. Why do they have to have repeat messages and now I’m in the mood for some fortune cookies? I guess I’ll have to take a trip to the grocery store to get some. I wonder if Poopies has them or if I’ll have to go over to Safeway.

And Sheridan continues to live in delusion land thinking she’s with the man of her dreams when the nightmare is just beginning. Oh that poor girl has no idea what’s going on at all. What an ass saying she looks like a horse. Well I wouldn’t mind looking like that kind of horse and I say that Jean Luc looks like a horse’s ass. She’s just spellbound by the accent not realizing that she’s going to have people trying to kill her shortly.

I have to say that I enjoy what is it Project Naked Man. I am really looking forward to that although no one actually gets naked but I’ll certainly enjoy the view. Yes the Lopez-Fitzgerald boys are pretty hot and any time a cutie takes his shirt off I’m a very content girl. Okay there might be some slight drooling but I’m sure no one will notice.

TC goes to the tent where Tabitha is and confronts her showing his wicked temper. He has no idea who was responsible for the accident that led to his knee getting hurt. Little does he know and it won’t be for quite some time will he find out the truth. Oh naughty Tabitha screwing with their minds but I’m enjoying watching her with Timmy of course who is a bad well I guess you’ll never know what since Tabitha shut him up before he could reveal that but I’m sure you have a pretty good idea.

It isn’t good when poor Theresa sees Ethan the man of her dreams kissing that skank er I mean Gwen. Okay I think at this point I didn’t really hate her but I certainly didn’t like her because I loved Theresa from the start. And ironically enough Galen’s has a little of Theresa in his new character on Days or maybe I’m just reaching but I don’t think so after all Rafe did mention the F word which seems to be Theresa’s favorite word. No it isn’t that F word because I’m talking about Fate.

When Ethan opens his fortune cookie it says something along the lines of the woman of his dreams always thinks of him and of course that’s Theresa not what’s her name. Why can’t I come up with a name like Endora did with Darren but I can’t think of something to change Gwen to. Got any suggestions? Oh I know I could go with Glen even though that’s a guy’s name. Yes I’m strange but you should know that by now that my brain works in strange and mysterious ways.

Poor Theresa is now stuck working at the cannery where more bad luck follows. Talk about having one crappy week or rather couple of days since I think it’s only been a few days. I’m just going by the number of clothing changes although it could be three and of course Ethan has had to change more because of the whole fun of getting stuff dumped on him. It’s a good thing he’s rich at least at this point anyway because more fun is to come when the cannery gets involved. Oh Luis that’s cruel making Theresa work there of all places. I don’t even like the stench of fish so that has to be absolute torture not to mention getting attacked by cats on the way home reeking of fish.

Eve ends up going to the Fortune Teller too and I have to wonder which secret Tabitha’s referring to. There are two but one of them Eve isn’t actually aware of so I’m thinking she’s just talking about the child she thought died all those years ago instead of the car accident. Little does she know how things tie together with her husband. I always thought it was kind of lame that TC’s father died of a broken heart simply because TC couldn’t play tennis. Was the father living through the son? Did TC really want to play tennis? Was he relieved when he couldn’t anymore? Is he now trying to live through his daughter?

And Charity is introduced when Faith who happens to be Grace’s identical twin hence them looking so much alike along with it being the same actress wigs out when her daughter comes out. She’s afraid of something and poor Charity is left in the dark about it. She only just finds out that her mom has a twin so she’s excited but Faith keeps the poor girl trapped and even home-schools her. Yikes! And she mentions the carnival so soon she’ll be Harmony bond but that’s a long trip but hey a lot awaits her.

When the little girl I think her name is Patty mentions a twin that seems to strike a chord with Grace after all she does have one even though she can’t remember. Who knew a fire could wipe out your memory? Anyhoo the angel comes back and she isn’t very helpful at all. If I had her turning up I’d think I was crazy.

The little girl ends up getting her ice cream all over her face. Poor Timmy is stuck at the mercy of this little girl. Such a horrible way to treat a doll dragging him around by his foot and getting ice cream in his hair. It was funny when he said he wasn’t going home with her to meet Bimbo Barbie. I must have missed that Barbie but I would imagine she wasn’t wearing much at all. The table knocks over all the bears which the girl wished she’d gotten instead and when she saw Timmy turn real she tossed him into the water. Oops but thankfully he was able to get out of the water.

Tabitha dresses up as a crazy gypsy and gives a fortune to both Theresa and Whitney. I think Tabitha is implying Whitney’s love of music although that doesn’t turn up till much later and doesn’t go very far. She spooks both girls and when TC finds out he shows his temper and goes off to the chick. That would have been funny if she was in the Burger Hut ordering a cheeseburger since she wouldn’t have blended in there and who calls a place Burger Hut anyway? Such an odd name but it’s gone now so no one wil go there again. Thanks Theresa for that.

Aw this is when Sheridan is sweet and oh so stupid thinking Jean Luc loves her not realizing that Mimi is fuming about Jean Luc proposing. Oh you dumb girl but at least you aren’t crazy at this point. Mimi should have spoken up when she had the chance. Did she really think Jean Luc would pass the phone back to Sheridan? Dumb girl very dumb.

Oh poor Theresa burned down the Burger Hut. She is having the worst day ever. So if you spill barbecue sauce after shakes over a customer especially a Crane although never mind about that one because it isn’t revealed at this point you get fired. She throws off the ridiculous hat and oops it lands on the grill and next thing you know the place is on fire. I suggest she works somewhere where things aren’t quite so flammable. It’s a good thing Ethan had already left because he’d really think she was insane.

Gwen decides to come home and gag have more sex with Ethan. Okay I don’t blame her since this Ethan is cute too but that’s all their relationship was since there really didn’t seem to be anything else to it. Too bad she isn’t allergic to barbecue sauce. That was one quick flight. Oh the wonders of being rich and being able to jump from Paris to Harmony so quickly. She doesn’t even appear to have jet lag but I don’t think she was there long enough to even get used to the time change whatever the time change is. Is France on the same time zone as Ireland? That involved math and as was shown earlier me and math just don’t mix.

Faith ends up seeing Sam’s email but she’s all paranoid about the person on the other end which is good but he’s the real deal. He was a bit too eager but I can’t blame the guy since he wants his wife to find out about any loved ones. That is odd that it would come as a surprise that the little girl I think Rosie is her name had a twin. If she knows your name Grace shouldn’t you know she has a twin? So on some level she remembers her twin without remembering her.

Oh Jessica continues to mock Kay. Sure those exercises really work. It does make me giggle when she does the arm movements and says, “I must, I must, I must increase my bust.” Well Kay you aren’t going to get him. I did like this first Kay and first Jessica. This was the one family where the people had some serious makeovers. Now if Theresa was a Bennett she would have been able to change her face but hey with a face like that why would she want to?

Tabitha dresses up like a fortune teller which a weird accent. I’m not sure what kind of accent that is but no one knows who she is and that includes Timmy. Poor Timmy gets taken by the little girl since Grace decided to give her the prize. Well she was the only one guessing the number of jelly beans in the jar so who else was she going to give Timmy to? So Theresa’s fortune awaits her.

Oh Whitney to me getting a life doesn’t involve getting a job at the Burger Hut. I wonder who would think they had the worst uniform Theresa or Buffy. Buffy did have that cow on her hat while Theresa has french fries. Damn that makes me hungry now so I’m glad I have some pizza in the oven. Hmm maybe there’s a potential idea that I’ll write up about Buffy and Theresa.

If Sheridan’s plain like a horse I’d like to be that way too. Oh wait no she isn’t so shame on you stupid man using poor Sheridan who thinks you’re the one but that’s before she meets Luis. Jean Luc is horrible saying she looks like a horse. She doesn’t look like any horse I’ve ever seen and I kind of find that a weird thing to say anyway since horses aren’t ugly. I guess if a human did look like a horse it wouldn’t look so good.

I do wonder why Faith is calling for Grace when Grace has no idea she exists. She does feel what Faith is feeling since she’s out of breath while her twin runs away from something and yes Grace evil would be the word but you’re kind of clueless about your neighbor not that I don’t adore Tabitha. I forget when the bowl pops up but it hasn’t yet but hey there’s Timmy. 

Oh Tabitha that isn’t very nice giving Timmy away like that although he does make the perfect spy. Yes wonder away Grace about what he’ll say but help is what he’ll say but I’m guessing she didn’t hear him call out. I always wondered why he talked in the third person. Is that the right person? He refers to himself by name which is what I mean or would that be the second person? 

So Theresa has her first day at the Burger Hut and Ethan just so happens to crave a burger. I guess that’s the only place in town since Harmony must be really small. Whitney and the others come to tease her a bit about the job and hello she has a customer who just so happens to be Ethan Crane the man of her dreams and the one she vows to marry. I think at this point she realizes who he is and oh crap he knows who she is too which isn’t good because the last time they met she accidentally bumped into that ladder and knocked blue paint all over him. 

Here’s a tip Theresa always read walk forwards instead of backwards to avoid any pesky ladders that just come out of nowhere. It also takes practice I guess but I’ve been doing it so long that it’s no big deal to me. She has a tray which she should have brought to wherever it was supposed to go instead of going to Ethan at that point. Of course she ends up spilling the drinks all over him. I don’t even want to think about how much his dry-cleaning bill is but hey he’s rich so it’s no big deal since he could blow his nose with hundred dollar bills if he wanted to not that I’d recommend that since that would be insane.

She was so desperate for him to stay that she got a little eager and knocked the glasses over. See why you should have put that tray elsewhere? She goes off to find something to clean him up with and grabs a pot of water is what she thought but nope it was barbecue sauce which she throws all over him. Not a good idea Theresa. You should have grabbed some paper towels and of course check to make sure you were actually getting water. Poor Ethan ends up getting a lot of stuff dumped on him and the worst is yet to come.

I really don’t like the idea of facing reality Whitney so I think I’ll keep dreaming. Listen to Mama Theresa and keep on dreaming since Ethan can be yours. Her dream did come true about him coming to the door but instead Luis answered the door. She still has no clue that he was the one with the paint all over him.

Poor Grace probably thinks she’s all crazy. Hey that isn’t very angelic behavior girl sending those bees over to Tabitha so she would stop eavesdropping. She did end up finishing Timmy who became a real boy. Oh how I loved Timmy. Such a shame that he died so young but at least I get to enjoy him on this.

Sheridan wakes up and she seems to be okay. Stupid Gwen didn’t think to call Ethan and instead left him hanging. That isn’t very nice. Yes I was hating her about now but the hate only grew as time passed on. Oh Sheridan Jean Luc is cheating on you with some skank so this dude is not for you. I guess the pretty people are also unlucky in love.

I wonder why no one except Tabitha of course noticed that Grace just levitated out of the window and that was the second floor. Maybe the angel girl needs tips on how to deal with Grace and how is she supposed to know what’s going on when she has no clue about what her first twenty years were like or if she even has any family like say a twin sister perhaps. They made Grace take a sleeping pill not declaring her insane thinking that maybe the little girl had something to do with her past. Would you really be concerned about your past with Sam as your husband? Come on you don’t have it so bad Grace except for being stalked by an angel which is a bit odd.

Tabitha is odd but I loved her from the start. And soon Timmy will join her since she’s sewing him up. Now if I tried to sew anything I’d end up with fingers that looked like I’d been attacked by an army of needles. So I’ll just leave the sewing to those who know how to wield a thread and needle without stabbing delicate parts. Sam remembers her from when he was a kid so Tabitha must have one hell of a beauty regimen since she’s much older than she looks. What’s your secret girl? Is it being a witch that is good for the skin?

Theresa is continuing to dream about Ethan not knowing that she already met him. Oops talk about needing a do over since that didn’t go too well with the paint and her getting her best sweater stained. Hey it would make me cranky too. Whitney declares her nuts but hey I love her kind of nuts. Why not dream about what seems impossible and wish for it to come true? Is that really so wrong? Luis doesn’t like it though since he wants her to work at the egads Burger Hut. Oh no that won’t be good.

I do enjoy watching Luis and Miguel play basketball. Hey that’s basketball porn after all and it didn’t hurt that Luis was showing off his very yummy chest. Didn’t you just want to jump through the screen and lick him from head to toe? Oh come on admit it at least to yourself if you won’t to anyone else. That ended much too soon if you ask me but hey at least he didn’t change before dancing in the kitchen as dinner was cooking showing just how different the Lopez-Fitzgeralds are from the Cranes.

Nice boyfriend Sheridan. Here she is in the hospital and her so called boyfriend wants to leave and makes a call and no it wasn’t business except for maybe monkey business. At least Gwen is there who I don’t think I really hated at this point although I didn’t really like her either after all she has Ethan which is all kinds of wrong since he belongs to Theresa. A girl shouldn’t be alone in the hospital without a friendly face to wake up to.

Nice Julian not really caring about how Sheridan is since the first question he asked was if Sheridan was drunk at the time. Talk about ironic since he along with Ivy drink like fish. I guess that’s why they have a driver to avoid that pesky drinking and driving thing which isn’t good at all. He does ask about her but doesn’t like the idea of Ethan going to see her and of course he wants to make sure there’s no publicity. After all you can’t let anyone know that the Cranes might just be human and father won’t be happy at all. Well he’s evil so of course he won’t but he doesn’t show up for a while so I’ll shut up about him.