Dishing The Soaps!

Stacie and Kristin head off to Vegas. When they go to the Ghost Bar and hey am I getting a case of deja vu here they meet some guys and one was some backup dancer for Backstreet Boys. Wouldn’t that be their cue to run away quickly or pretend to need to use the bathroom and ditch him? He seemed to be putting stripper moves on them and what kind of name is J Rock anyway? Maybe it was JD Rock but I think it was J Rock. Maybe he has a head like a rock. So Kristin ends up heading outside and calls Bobby who ends up coming to Vegas too. So much for the girls weekend.

Stacie found Kristin eating ice cream in bed and hello the shower is running. Out comes Justin Bobby wearing a towel which explains the champagne and ice cream. So classy and damn now I feel like having some ice cream. That’s kind of a weird combo. Well I guess it could be weirder since cookies and champagne would probably be stranger. She so wanted Stacie to see Justin Bobby come out of the shower but alas he was wearing a towel. Just think if they had to fuzz little Justin Bobby out. I guess they don’t do the blue dots anymore. Why were they blue anyway? See the weirdness that creeps into my head.

They end up going out and Stacie’s a big honking third wheel. Since Justin Bobby is so very classy they end up at a strip join but they do look like they had fun. And there was kissing. Yes Kristin kissed Justin Bobby and Stacie who really seemed to enjoy it. It was like the guy was trapped in a wet dream only real. And nothing says classy like wearing some strange chick’s panties on your head. I’m just not sure what the stripper did to Kristin. On her? Maybe she went down on her nether regions? Yes I even tried closed caption to try to figure out if the missing word or two would show up but no such luck.

Maybe now Audrina will give Derek a chance since he seems like a nice guy and she doesn’t have to worry about Justin Bobby although I’m thinking he’s going to pull the same thing on Audrina. Come on after four and a half years he claims it meant nothing. This is the dude who isn’t too bad one on one briefly but later denies things that actually happen like that phone call that Audrina made to him that he denied. Well he’s Kristin’s problem now but I kind of doubt she’d wait so long to get rid of him although she is falling into that pattern of wanting to give him the boot only to get sucked back in. Hell even his friends say he makes a crappy boyfriend.

That’s just bizarre that Charlie at least I think his name is Charlie is such a baby expert. That was just weird. And why does have have a baby name book? He was just chock full of knowledge and yes I went to YouTube and found some stuff. What like you didn’t do the same thing. So Spencer tested Heidi since he found a pregnancy test. What is that girl thinking? You don’t get yourself knocked up to get a baby when the guy doesn’t want a kid. She didn’t drink which was a surprise but it turns out that she isn’t pregnant but hey Enzo’s her favorite subject. He’s no Jensen Ackles. Now I need to go wipe up some drool since something popped into my head that involves a blue towel.

I guess shrinks aren’t supposed to tell a patient that they’re being stupid although I’m sure that’s what she was thinking about Heidi. She wants to stop taking her birth control in the hopes of getting pregnant. Um shouldn’t they have that settled before getting married? Forget the same page I’m not sure if those two are in the same chapter or even the same book.

Heidi seems to think that getting pregnant will make Spencer realize that he wants kids. It doesn’t even register that there are people out there that don’t want kids and Spencer would be one of them. Sure he might want them one day but I’m going to guess and say probably not so it would be very dumb for her to get knocked up.

I think Kristin’s growing on me. I have to admit that I agree that Jayde’s a bitch. I’m not really surprised about Brody getting back together with her although I’d say Kristin and him are a better match. Yes I just said that. He doesn’t seem happy with Jayde and with Kristin it was pretty calm and comfy when those two were together.

So will this finally be the end of Justin Bobby for Audrina? Deja vu isn’t it? Hopefully it will be for her sake but it looks like Kristin might be getting sucked in. Stacie and Kristin are heading to Vegas. Oh no please don’t have anyone say that stupid saying that I believe started with Vegas but ends up getting applied to other places. Don’t even think about it.

Well with Jayde out of the picture Brody and Kristin start hanging out. Of course they end up going out and enter the psycho with her buddies. Yes that was oh so smart to go over and reveal your insane status. He’s nut if he goes back to her. I wonder what moisturizer Brody’s Mom uses. Maybe she had him when she was a teenager.

Someone had a dumb moment. I have plenty myself but if I was composing a list this would go on it and at the top too. Since Spencer doesn’t want kids which would be smart he decided to get a vasectomy because of course you can just turn it back on when you want kids right? Well that’s what he thought. He changed his mind after talking to the doctor. So there’s trouble in paradise and if Enzo’s around don’t mention something since the boy’s like a parrot. So he’s in the doghouse with the puppies. And what’s wrong with puppies since they are family too?

Will it finally be the end of Justin Bobby and Audrina? Both girls should forget about him. Does he emit rays of something that draws in certain girls? The dude’s a crappy boyfriend not to mention his issue about the B word. Maybe Audrina and Kristin could bond over what the hell was I thinking when I thought Justin Bobby could be my boyfriend. I wonder what nickname Lo would come up with if the need should arise.

glitter-graphics.comWell Kristin and Audrina finally come face to face. It had to happen sooner or later and it didn’t go so well. Gee not so surprised about that. I guess that’s why Justin Bobby encouraged her to talk to Audrina. Um U thought he wanted to meet Audrina not the other way around and that it was just the once and butt out Stacie of the stupid spelling. So it looks like she’s done with him and the two won’t be friends. Well there are just some people you can’t be friends with.

It wasn’t diamonds that Heidi got for her birthday but puppies that are the only babies she’s going to get. Spencer has enough sense to know what a bad idea it would be to have little Spencers and Spencettes running around. That shows signs of a functioning brain. And thank the Gods he wasn’t waring that stupid hat. And where was Holly? I noticed she wasn’t at the party. I’m pretty sure I would have seen her if she came.

So much for breaking up with Jack. Kristin has a party and the second Holly shows up she starts drinking. Yes once again she does the Holly dancing which is entertaining but of course this leads to concern on Stephanie’s part which leads to a really crappy intervention. Did they really think that would work? Okay Stephanie was in rehab but come on is she the right person to ask when you’re trying to do an intervention? How about having someone there that actually knows something. It didn’t go well and Holly ended up leaving.

Justin Bobby sent what has to be one of the dumbest text messages ever. Now I really wouldn’t know since I’m not enslaved to a phone and don’t actually text message anyone but Sorry, Boo, Strike too is pretty lame. It was his way of saying he wasn’t going to come to the party. He did end up showing up and said it was a joke. I guess he doesn’t get the part where a joke is actually supposed to be funny. Maybe if he read a book or maybe looked up jokes online he could have written a text that was an actual joke instead of something really lame.

Is this finally the end of Jayde and Brody? I certainly hope so since they obviously don’t fit. They get into stupid fights. No I don’t want to go to the party but I’m going to show up and start crying in the kitchen. And it didn’t help that it looks like Brody might have feelings for Kristin. Okay he said he wasn’t sure which isn’t a good sign for this relationship going anywhere.

I think Enzo might actually be growing on Spencer. Once again Heidi was babysitting him and they each had the little guy repeat what they were saying. He did show that he has brains when he told Spencer that he was wrong. He’s cute but also creepy at the same time if that makes anything resembling sense. And I saw the same name I think in the credits of IT. So he has the sense to know that Spencer’s not exactly a brain.

I’d have to say the best part was Holly getting shitfaced. At least she was having a good time unlike the others. Um shouldn’t Heidi know what’s going on with her sister? She was asking Stephanie like she should know about Holly’s drinking. That just makes it sound like she never sees her. The dancing was funny but hey she was enjoying herself. Stephanie did mention Holly getting thrown out. She didn’t seem all that out of control. Sure she was dancing but she wasn’t that crazy at least it didn’t seem that way.

The other people looked like they were at a funeral. Since Heidi’s worried she invites Holly to lunch and she orders a Margarita and that Patron the tequila of choice for Spencer. She claims that she just drinks for special occasions. Well maybe it was after all who knows when she last saw Heidi. That hat of Spencer’s just amuses me. He was all quiet at the event. I think I’d be turned off of booze and their company if he called me a Long Haired Spencer but he did say better dancer. Oh my get another drink girl.

Sure I get why Heidi would be worried but I’m not sure if there’s anything to worry about. Maybe if she actually sees her sister more she can find out if there is a problem.  I’m not sure if Stephanie is the best person to talk to after all she can’t seem to remember Derek’s name for some reason. What is that about? Maybe she has a phobia of the name Derek. I seem to have a comma phobia so why not a phobia about some guy’s name. Maybe she had a crappy Derek experience and I realize he might spell it different but I’m going with this spelling so there. If there are going to be multiple spellings of a name I’m just going to spell it the way I spell it. What is the point anyway? Oh you want it to look different but guess what the pronunciation isn’t any different even with some of the letters changed.

I think I’d be a bit upset to find out that someone broke in even if he was cooking dinner. Okay if he was Jensen Ackles I wouldn’t care and hell I wouldn’t be able to speak. I’d be too busy trying not to pass out or say something stupid or heaven forbid fart because that would be too horrible. She went to visit her Dad and Step-mom which is when he broke in. Aw isn’t that sweet breaking in and cooking dinner to make up for being a flake. She seems to be getting sucked into the spell that is Justin Bobby. I seem to be immune.

Audrina is so not over Justin Bobby. Derek asked her and she said yeah but in a way that also said no I’m not. I’m really hoping he comes to his senses and drops that bitch and comes back to me. Maybe I’m reading more into it but that’s the impression I got. And it certainly didn’t help matters any when Justin Bobby sang her praises. Why did they get together anyway? He was pissed because she had the nerve of hanging out with Derek. What the hell? I say both girls should just forget about him and move on because he’s a crappy boyfriend. Hell even Brody knows that.

Yes I watched again. Well I got to have something up on the weekends since soaps are only on during the week. Anyway Kristin did amuse me even though I still think she’s a bitch. Oh right it is always a great idea to pay a visit to a sex shop when you’re looking for a birthday present. And Jayde whose name I don’t like well the spelling anyway if you asked me wasn’t too happy about it either. Maybe she should have told him to open it later when Mom wasn’t around to see it. Now Audrina might have wanted to go to that party.

Well that’s nice to know that if Justin Bobby ever forgets where he came from he can just pull his shirt up and find out because there it is. That is certainly big isn’t it? At least he doesn’t look like a serial killer anymore. I wasn’t surprised that he flaked so now Kristin’s getting a taste of what Audrina went through. And that wasn’t the first time I’ve seen him picking his nose either. Do your nose picking in private. Sure you might need to dig something out but no one wants to see that. Four hundred bucks for a bikini? Gee it must be nice to have that much money to waste on a bikini.

Uh oh Enzo came back. Sure I might not be a fan of kids either but come on that was mean of them to do that to the poor kid. He actually seems to like Spencer for some reason and his idiotic friend threw a golf ball at him. Sure it was funny when Kristin got smacked in the face with the water balloon but come on you don’t go around throwing things at a little kid. Oh the horrors if he became a father. I don’t know what Heidi’s thinking. Oh yes she isn’t thinking. And what in the hell is that thing around his neck? A beaver skin hat? Really? Did he mug Garth Brooks? He thinks he looks good? That was just tacky of him. Dumbass it is polite to remove the hat when you’re eating especially when you look like an idiot.  They should have gone to dinner someplace where they could have gone through the drive-thru which would have led to Heidi not being totally embarrassed by her husband’s poor choice of outfit. Well the outfit pretty much went unnoticed. I think he was wearing black but the hat just looks silly.

Hmm maybe I’ll be sucked out of this which I’ve been sucked into. In case you don’t read my regular blog you might be aware of how I feel about reality TV. I won’t go on about that here. Um you didn’t just say hi to Caveman now renamed Mime Boy since you were coping a feel. I don’t blame Audrina for not wanting to go to lunch with her. I wouldn’t want to go either. What is it about blondes and bitchitude. It seems like some of the nastiest people tend to be blondes. Now I’m not saying every blonde is a bitch but it can see that way although a lot of blondes aren’t actual  blondes.

Sure she isn’t friends with Audrina but that was pretty tacky to just go after the guy like that. I’ll admit to some boredom and what is up with soft clothes? Does she mean the clothes are soft? Beware of the man eater and avoid her as much as possible. It’s like Kristin was trying to show hey I’m not a bitch see I offered to go to lunch with you but you stood me up kind of thing. It was pretty stupid to think she’d just show up and they’d be what gal pals? Getting together but in a more casual way might have been better because a meal just sounds like too much.

Wow Stephanie said the smartest thing ever. I think it might have been a fluke. I’m still trying to wrap my head around those arm gestures she made about Spencer’s hat. I’m not sure what that was about so I’m not going to hurt my brain by trying to figure it out. That would be incredibly stupid for Spencer and Heidi to have kids since they are the poster children for a couple that should be using birth control. Heidi you already have a kid so you don’t need another one. How about trying a dog instead?

Okay it did sound like Kristin might have had good intentions but that seemed to go right out the window. At least he lost the Caveman look. Well that’s nice that he’s continuing to lie to Kristin because they were together which he seems to forget. Maybe Audrina should have called at least. Oh yes the bitch emerges after she makes an attempt to show that she isn’t a bitch. Yes I’m bored and no Justin Bobby won’t be added to the list of suspenders porn since he just looked like a mime without the face paint.

Enzo is cute but at the same time he’s creepy. Wanna see me play? Someone’s channeling Chucky. Well I would think Spender as he called Spencer would have a lot in common with that kid since he has the same maturity level. But he was mean to the kid. When did Heidi decide she wanted a kid anyway? That would be such a horrible idea. I guess he won’t be babysitting. I guess it would be creepier if he looked like Chucky.

Well I guess Audrina’s fun night wasn’t so fun. It looked better at Stephanie’s night out. So not surprised that Kristin and Justin Bobby were kissing. At least he shaved that serial killer beard off. Guess what a beard doesn’t always work and full fluffy ones just don’t work on people. I just don’t get the appeal since he’s a cheater and has a big problem with lying not to mention being deathly afraid of the B word.

Oops I ended up getting sucked in and thought I’d instead babble about it over here. I’ll see about having it up on Sunday next time. I just got a little behind with Hollyoaks Later added in because it was like fifteen episodes this week. Well that was an hour long and regular Hollyoaks is a half hour. See I don’t totally suck at math. And since I’m trying to make sure that I post every day I thought I’d just toss this in too along with any catching up on the soaps I might need to do although I try to have them up on the same day if possible.

Now on to the babble. I kind of had a feeling that Kristin would be a bitch. Hee she’s driving the same car in the opening. I bet Lauren’s relieved she doesn’t have to deal with this bitch. Yes she’s a bitch and apparently broke a record for the most swearing. I bet her parents are proud and now she’s get her eyes on Justin Bobby or as I’m going to call him Caveman. He could totally do those Geico commercials. Was that the one with the Cave People?

Sure Kristin isn’t friends with Audrina but that was still tacky for her to make a move on Caveman. Why fight over that? Come on really? He’s no prize. He also seems to have a problem with his memory because he was with Audrina even if he didn’t actually say boyfriend. So he’s a liar and has memory problems so he’s no prize really. But this chick strikes me as the type that enjoys stirring things up and Spencer seems to really love that since he enjoyed the fighting.

Yes listen to Lo you don’t want to get on this girl’s bad side although I’m not sure if she actually has a bad side. She did grope Caveman. Maybe this will finally make Audrina realize what a loser Caveman is and that he just isn’t worth it. Hell she could do a hell of a lot better. Let the slut have him although I can understand why she’s upset since they were together regardless of whether he wants to admit it for a long time. So it was smart of her to avoid that party since I’m thinking it would have gotten pretty ugly.

Oh that’s nice Spencer got the classy Tequila. And was that a stab at Lauren? Heidi did mention that it was nice that they could have a party where everyone could come. Um are we having a dumb blonde moment? No wonder he likes her and she’s the one that paired these two up. And what’s up with that stupid cowboy hat? You really don’t need your head to look bigger.

I think Jayde doesn’t like clothes. Oh the horrors of throwing something on over the bikini. If she doesn’t want to go then why is she in a bikini? So there’s someone even crazier than her since she seems to have calmed down a bit. Sure there was that bump in the road with Audrina but that seems to be over. Now the bitch is here and ready to cause trouble. I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with her since she doesn’t seem very pleasant at all but it can be fun to see people when they are totally bitchy and possibly nuts.

Oh god that’s just horrible the thought of Spencer having spawn. No I don’t think the world’s ready for that. Now don’t think I’m liking Spencer but I have to admit that I liked the place he picked even though he went behind Heidi’s back and got the house. Oh the horrors could you imagine the kids having a reality show? That sounds like a nightmare because there are too many of them out there. I think this show gives out crackwaves that sucks you in against your will. Heidi was funny when she gushed over that first house. Um aren’t pools usually deep?